Sometimes a painting is a sketch. Sometimes the finished and polished outlook is deceiving, because the painting is only a step towards a better realization of an idea. Every new painting is nearer to a final bundle of emotions, pictures, smells, nearer a whole story which will be crystallized in this perfect painting. This idea reveals itself as something eternal I must excavate. It’s a process Plato named anamnesis – the rediscovering of perennial wisdom. I can only try to catch the idea, but will never be able to really show its form.
I want to write of hope, of the awakening mind, which realizes the truth. But can I? I want to write of the sun as a symbol of hope, of the Enlightenment, which will arise every day anew. I want to write of nature and love and happiness, of knowledge and curiosity. But I can’t.
While researching ancient symbols of the sun you find a wild (and sad) concoction of esoterism and right-wing radicalism. The rising sun a synonym for military atrocities. The invisible sun as an alleged symbol of magical wisdom passed down from Akkad to the Nazis. The black sun a manifestation of everything which is wrong.
Some time ago, I visited the German Castel Wewelsburg, where the symbol of the black sun can be found as a mosaic in the north tower. Till today it is unknown if the mosaic was built by the Nazi Regime or if it predates this era. Nevertheless, it now is widely used in the right scene, although there are often attempts to justify the use of this symbol by connecting it to older sources. After seeing the castle, its museum and more important the hints of the once nearby built concentration camp, I can only feel a deep sadness. I cannot understand why anybody wants to use a symbol which is related to such horror (indifferent if the relation is rightful or not)
The concentration camp near Wewelsburg is so horrible for me, because nearly nothing is left, only a small stone panel on a meadow (former parade ground) reminds of the thousands of murdered people. One of the remaining houses (gatehouse) of the camp are used today as family apartments. This is history buried.
(But I must counter that the museum at Castel Wewelsburg with its exhibition ‘Ideology and terror of the SS’ is very educational. I hope this helps to counter the seemingly oblivion of the former concentration camp)
Considering this gruesome history, it is hard for me to believe into the “awakening” of the soul or mind or whatever… There are to many people who claim to have found wisdom or epiphany only to afterwards separate the awakened from the ignorant, the masters from the dominated, the followers from the enemy. Maybe awakening is only possible by destroying everything which is human, when subject and object are one and opposites are identified as one. But I do not know the way.